What do you do when you find out your spouse has had an affair? How do you cope?
Surviving an affair was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life! Not only did I have to survive, but I also wanted our marriage to survive. That’s like trying to carry two 1-ton boulders up a hill at the same time.
It felt like I was Sisyphus, the greek god who’s punishment was to roll a huge boulder up a hill to only see it roll back down. That’s how I felt. When I would get my mindset in a good place and start healing, the relationship with my wife would go downhill. Then I’d work on that and my mindset would go downhill. You get the picture? I’m sure you do because you’ve probably felt the same things.
The truth is, you can’t repair the relationship until you yourself are in a healthy place.
If you’ve just found out that your spouse has betrayed you with another, you’ve been dealt a huge blow. Your first instinct is to try to figure out and repair the relationship. Don’t do it!
Take a breath and start figuring out what you need. If you don’t take care of yourself first, anything else you do will be meaningless.